Sometimes Alone in a Room

When I am alone in the room,
And the windows are closed,
I sit to myself in silence
Wondering what the world would
Be like without out.

Your words hurt,
Leavings wounds that never heal.
My mind stores everything you say,
Becoming constant reminders
Of the cruel side of who you are.

You make me want to hide
In the shadows,
Making me feel I am not
Worthy of this life.
And my body yearns
For love and affection
Which you take away
From me freely.

I walk out the door
Envisioning what it would be like
To never come back
Thinking that
Perhaps we are better off living
Worlds apart,
No longer able to take
The damage of your
Spiteful tongue.

When I am alone in the room,
I tend to find peace within myself
When you are not there.
It soothes the fear that rises
Up within me…
A fear that you will cut me down
If I speak out of term.
If I make a mistake.

You do not accept my flaws
Or my imperfection.
This is what breaks my heart
Beyond anything else in life.

You expect me to provide you
Shelter and meals
To supply your comfort of living,
While I am hurting deep down inside.

When I am alone in the room,
And you are not there,
I find myself praying for the day
For you to leave
And never come back.
I will cry for a moment,
But those tears will turn
To tears of relief
Because I will finally be free
Of this pain I carry.

For the book, “Imperfection: Of Life’s Devine
Written May 18, 2015
All Rights Reserved


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